Tuesday, December 29, 2015

My Books

Once again, I'd like to remind everyone that I have quite a few books available on Amazon.  So if you like the content I post on this blog, please head over to My Amazon Author Page to see what I have to offer.  Not only are they enjoyable reads, you'd also be supporting my efforts to continue providing content.

If you do purchase one of the books, please remember to rate/review them.

These are the current titles available.  Just click on the cover image to redirected to the book's listing on Amazon.  Enjoy!

An Experiment: A Tale of Gender Role Reversal

Casey and Alexis Matheson are a young, married couple on a cross-country trip when they are abducted, imprisoned, tortured, and ultimately, transformed by a pair of mad physicians hell-bent on changing the world’s perception of gender. A tale of twisted experimentation unfolds as Casey and Alexis try to maintain their sanity and identities. Can they escape? Or are they destined to live their lives as glorified lab rats in the doctors’ macabre experiment? 


Adam is a normal guy living a normal life when, on his eighteenth birthday, his life is turned upside down by a sudden ability to read minds. As he struggles to come to grips with knowing everyone's deepest, darkest secrets, the power evolves, giving him complete control over those around him. Armed with this god-like power, he devolves into a monstrous arbiter of twisted justice.

The Big Pink Book of Feminization

Pink is a collection of short stories focused on the feminization of men. From a disgraced former football player seeking a new identity to an alternate reality where gender roles (and more!) have been magically switched, there's something for every fan of feminization fiction - all in bite sized portions!

A Warrior Reborn

A Warrior Reborn tells the tale of Tristan, a warrior prince, who is captured and transformed into a feminine sex slave. Follow him as he tries to deal with his new sexual role. 

Love, sex, and revenge follow him through his story. 

The Omar Bell Universe

Book One: The Bully

George spent the majority of his formative years being tormented and bullied. After his bully follows him to college, he retreats into his studies, and becomes a rich, world-renowned scientist. Soon, he turns to revenge as a means of providing fulfillment, and develops a biochemical compound which serves as a means of vengeance by transforming his former bully, body and mind. Follow Leo, the bully, as he undergoes that transformation. 

Book Two: A Warning

After years of making his living by robbing drug dealers, Maurice finally crosses the line from nuisance to problem when he repeatedly targets a powerful drug lord's business. When he's inevitably captured, the drug lord seeks out Dr. Omar Bell to help him develop a way to transform Maurice from stick-up boy to a walking, talking warning to anyone who might have similar aspirations. 

Book Three: Nepotism

Despite his years of loyal service and competence, when the CEO's nephew, Tony, screws up, Mike becomes the scapegoat. Without his career to drive him, he sinks into a deep depression until he latches onto one simple concept: revenge. When a friend from college shows up, the plan takes a wild turn, resulting in a plot to take away Tony's pride and joy - his son, Phillip. 

Book Four: The Island of Dr. Bell

Given the opportunity of a lifetime, newly graduated engineer Riley Diaz takes a job working for a renowned, Nobel Prize-winning scientist. Before he knows it, he's whisked off to a private island paradise where he's put to work developing a piece of life-changing technology. But as the the island's population begins to experience peculiar changes, Riley starts to suspect that the island isn't what it appears to be. As he tries to cope with his own changing body, Riley must attempt to discover the truth of the island and its owner, Dr. Omar Bell. 

Book Five: Becoming a Boi

When Dr. Omar Bell, a respected biochemist, releases a statement that he's enacted a plan to feminize the world's population of white men, everyone is convinced that his claims are a hoax. However, when white men start changing, becoming more feminine by the day, everyone is forced to accept that the situation is as real as it gets. 

Follow Bill as he tries to cope with his increasingly feminine body while attempting to maintain his marriage and masculinity. 

Book Six: The Football Star

When Dr. Omar Bell, a respected biochemist, releases a statement that he's enacted a plan to feminize the world's population of white men, everyone is convinced that his claims are a hoax. However, when white men start changing, becoming more feminine by the day, everyone is forced to accept that the situation is as real as it gets. 

Follow Brandon Hayes as he struggles to cope with the transformation from star football player to small, feminine boi


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  3. dear Nikki, Will you help me feminize myself? I am married, 69 yrs young, submissive, wear panties and bra, trying to enlarge my breasts. My clit is always soft (ED got me after cancerous prostate removal), clit is now 1.8"(short and totally useless). I live as a male but know that I have a female person inside my body, brain and soul. The American Indians called people like me "Two Spirited"; having or wanting both genders,(spiritually, mentally and physically) in the same body. I would truly love to have periods, make my own babies, breast feed them, have sex with both genders as the situation and feelings permitted. I still want to be male but female also. Will you PLEASE help me to bring my female self out! Love and Kisses, billie=====> sorry for the duplication but i forgot to check "Notify me"

    1. After reading your comment a few times, I'm still at something of a loss as to how to answer. The reality is that helping people realize their gender identity is not what I do. I write silly stories attached to dirty pictures; that's it. I don't have my own life figured out, so I can't imagine trying to help someone "feminize" himself. I'm simply not qualified.

      That said, my advice (for what it's worth - which is to say, not much) is to do whatever makes you happy. I know that's a lot more difficult than it seems, what with personal and professional relationships and societal expectations, but in my estimation, it's the only way to achieve something resembling contentment.

      Just be who you are - maybe in private at first - and maybe you'll find the courage/will/desire to take it further. Or maybe you'll find that having your special, private moments is enough.

      Just my two cents. Take my comments as you will. I hope you figure it out, and can find some sort of balance between your two "spirits."

    2. Niki,
      After reading your beautiful letter i ran to the bedroom and jumped into my panties (metophoricaly speaking, i had to wait for the wife to leave). First i feel i must comment, you are not the writer of "silly stories"! Your letter is clear, concise, heart felt and empathetic. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I can't talk about these feelings with the wife as i have with you without her getting defensive, angry, calling me what i am (a sissy girl) and threatening divorce. Please have patience with me, just listen and write back when it is possible with any wisdom or in sites that you have. I never expected a reply from you as i have written others many many times with no answers.

      It is so sad that i or anyone for that matter must consider others reactions to my innermost feelings. I am not telling them how to think, dress, act or behave. My sexual feelings are my own, they are what i was born with, i can't f...ng help who i am in my inner most core anymore than they can. i have always, from my earliest times, known that i was "different" from others, especially the boys. They played war and i wanted to ply jacks with the girls. Did i ever get hell when i tried to, the adults didn't even want the boys and the girls to play together. Segragation of the genders doesn't work.

      i felt so bad and dirty when i discovered masturbation at age 9, but it was my only escape from this Tirany, it was mine, mine alone. It gave me pleasure not pain. Now i know i was to young for such sexual knowledge but then it was a different story. Mommy's panties at about age 10 gave me so many sensual delights. For one thing, it was as if my male mistake between my legs was hidden away and i felt all girlie like for even just the little time i could steal them from Mommy's panty drawer. i had to wait a few years till i could fit into one of Mommy's bras (band wise not cup wise) and then a slip from Mommy's dainty drawer. OOOOOOHHHHHH, so sexy, so smooth, sooo good. If i was ever caught, which i was, i was severely beaten (yes beaten not just spanked) by both Mommy and Daddy on the face and all over my bare body. (why did i have to be naked?) With belts, brushes, rulers or just their plain hands if they didn't have anything else. Being sexually different from the "norm" was forbidden, extreemly forbidden.

      And yet, i still don't understand how Mommy allowed Grandma to sexually abuse me for two full years! Grandma would make me pee with my pants and shorts pulled down to my ankles and stand over me ad watch em pee. Then she would take paper and rub, rub, rub over my "pee pee button" as she called it from below my scrotum to over the head of my clit. Over and over again she would do this sometimes for more than 30 seconds. Eww! It made me feel so dirty and unclean. I told Mommy right away and she ordered me not to talk or think about it, "It is just Grandma's way of showing you she loves you". Bu masturbating me??????? It was rape, pure and simple. But now they are all dead and i can't tell anyone but you or as i did my counselor, for 5 years. He didn't do me any good as to heal this open wound, over 50 years ago.

      Niki is it any wonder i have these mixed up hurtful feelings inside of me just tearing me apart.

      i know i have said many things here that you cannot give insite on but simply telling someone, you my Friend, does help. Again, I will be very surprised to hear from you again, but i really do hope and pray that i do. i would like to correspond with you, if this is possible. my email is anbhow1@yahoo.com if this is a possibility. Please call me bill or billie which ever.

      Love and Kisses

    3. Billie,

      That is horrifying! I can't imagine how anyone could allow something like that to happen to a child. I'm so sorry that you had to live through that. It's a shame that she was never punished for her deplorable act. I wish I could tell you to just try to move past it, but that's not really possible with something like that, is it? That sort of trauma sticks with us until the day we die. Maybe it's not always at the front of our minds, but that memory is always there, waiting to ambush us in the night. I don't know how to make that any better, except to say that I'm glad you can talk about it. Maybe if you do, you can find some semblance of peace.

      Again, I'm not really an authority on any of this. I'm not a psychiatrist, and I certainly don't have any more answers than anyone else. But if you want to keep writing, I'l listen. I hope that helps.

    4. Dearest Niki,
      Thank you for your kind, understanding and very thoughtful letter. You say your not a psychiatrist but having a friend to talk to helps more than having to pay someone to get half baked advise. Somehow I fee close to you and can be candid and open with you. I can't go into this every day because even after 50+ years the pain is still to intense. It is why i'm a bi/gay/sissy boy. It is why I act out in perverted ways looking at porn and dressing up as a woman and trying (successfully i guess) to minimunize my (in my mind) mistaken body parts. I am a masturbator to excess and even without an erection i find was to orgasm by rubbing my tiny pee pee button through my panties. Grandma used to call my little boy penis my pee pee button when she would rape me during my pre-puberty years. Today it isn't much bigger than it was then, but now it's due to age and the operation that removed my major hormone factory, the prostate.

      I know your time is valuable and i don't want to wast it on the likes of me, but if we could talk, even like this, it does seem to help, in the short term at least.

      I cannot tell you how many thousands of times that my dear departed Mommy told me that sex, anything related to sex was dirty, filthy and perverted. And that any little boy, like me, that did sexual things, thought sexual thoughts or even wondered about sexual things, was a dirty, perverted, filthy little boy that would burn in hell for all eternity. To touch myseld was a mortal sin. To masturbate would send me to hell, cause the epiliptic seizures that i had, make my face break out, give me headaches and lead me into the gutter with all the other perverts. She ruled the house hold, her word was law, she was the discliplinary Goddess of my world. So what did i do, of course, I did what she said not to do. Today i am a sissy, bi/gay perv. with a tiny clit/penis wearing panties and bras and all sorts of such stuff. I make myself so sick to my stomach by what i do ad things i want that i want to puke all over myself. I want my Daddy to come and take me by the arm and yank my pants and panties down and mu shirt off and whip me with his belt until the welts stand out to a bloody inch. To bad he died of cancer i could really use a good child beating sometimes, right about now in fact.

      He used to beat me each and every night even when i tried my hardest to be good. Off came my clothes and WACK, WACK, WACK, he would whip me with his belt until i was red as a beat. then i was made to go stand in a corner and "think" abiyt what i had done which was usually nothing. My skin grew cold, even in the summer, as the blood withdrew from the skin and receded back in to my body and i would shiver a lot. Sometimes i was made stand naked in the corner for many hours, 3-4 or more. It didn't matter if anyone walked past me either, males or females, all would see my naked shivering shameful body right there. Yes even neighbors. Back in tose days parents could beat their children and it was good for them. HA!!!!!!!!

      Thank you for listening again. If you will allow me to I will write again. As I said, I know your time is of great value and i don't expect you to be able to reply to just an insignificant pervert like me, but i do thank you for doing so this far. Your a great comforter Dear Friend Niki and i will keep you in my prayers.

      Love and Kisses

    5. AHHH!!!! Niki,
      I just had a thought. Are our discussions here visable only to you and me or can other people see them?

    6. They're visible to anyone who happens to click on this page.

    7. Oh well, so there visabel to everyone. So what? Right? Some of my pains were caused fron the actions of people that should have been exposed long ago, the rapes, the beatings, the physical and mental abuses that i suffered as a youngster caused me great emotional, physical and spiritual pains and were contributing factors to me becoming so deeply depressed later in life that i broke the law and will never be forgiven for my actions by either family or society. Life is not fair all the time, but no one said it would be. However, Those that have charge over us and are trusted to nurture us through birth, child hood and into adulthood are, I believe, supposed to be held to account for their actions in a higher manor than those of us, like myself, that have never had a child. What a precious gift from God a child is, so innocent, so trusting, so totally dependent on everyone for everything from food, clothing, medical care, education...everything. I know of no one that disagrees with what I have just said. I would truly appreciate you intake on these views Niki. Thank you for you ear and time.
      Love and Kisses.

      i could write to you to your email if you think that this is taking to much site space, i am not hurt by this fact that it might. Again, i know your a busy writer and i do appreciate any time you take with me. <3

    8. I've got no problem with corresponding like this or through email. If you prefer email, my address is nrs702@gmail.com.

  4. PPS
    Who is the model in the pic at the opening of this site??? What I would give to have her body looks and age. Our wee-wee's are just about the same size also. LOL.

    1. I honestly don't know the name of the model, and wouldn't be surprised if she's an amateur. I wanted something fairly simple when I was redesigning the site, and this one sort of just stood out. It also had the added bonus of being fairly easily modified (because of the angle and lighting).

    2. she is so sweet and innocent looking among a world of baying wolfs. I mean it is obvious she is a male in transition to where she should have been if Mother Nature hadn't made a slip up, but she has that sweet, wholesome, healthy look that most of us strive for and some of us never attain.

      Thank you for your conideration in the communication thing. I want to send you something that i wrote and will greatly value your opinion, but over on the email thing.

    3. I'm not sure if you're just immersed in the roleplay (it happens on sites like this a lot) or if you're serious, but I feel that I should reassert the fact that none of the people in my captions are actually transgender. They're pictures of genetic women which I've modified extensively via Photoshop.

    4. You are a Photoshopper then, correct? Hmmm, very interesting. But the images are still very lovely Niki, i am sure you agree or they would not be here.

      About the other things i was discussing with you, all are true and serious subjects. It does not matter to me whether or not you have a degree in psychology as i simply need to talk to someone, you, about them. Please keep your good work up and our lines of communication open, ok. Thanks.

      Love and Kisses

  5. Niki, ok so i might be a little slow on the dray. you said that none of the people in your captions are actually transgender. Hmmm, let me just say that you do good work then. Fooled me totally. How many of the people in porn movies are really transgender? The so called Shemales or chicks with dicks?
    There are a great many "Shemales" in porn that are very pretty. If i were not married i would not hesitate to date or have sex with one of these lovely ladies, who knows even marry. Your cover person looks real. WOW!!!!! Love and kisses for today.
    I have to go do my sissy housework.

    1. You're correct. Every single one of the models in these captions is a genetic female. I do this for a couple of reasons. First, I prefer to work with an idealized vision. It's more effective that way, especially when you consider that this is, for all intents and purposes, porn. Second, when I started doing this, I wanted to learn how to manipulate images. I grew up as an artist, and the idea appealed to me. And finally, the most important reason is that I'd prefer not to cheapen someone's real struggle by applying (what they might consider) offensive labels (like sissy) or by using masculine pronouns (which can be a sore issue, even in the context of a fictional story).

      To the issue of deciding what's real and what's not, the best I can tell you is that if it's in motion, it's probably real. Photorealistic CGI is incredibly time-consuming and, by extension, expensive. No one is going to apply that kind of effort to porn. Photos, however, are fairly easy to manipulate with enough practice), so your guess is as good as mine. Some are real. Some aren't.

      And thank you for the compliments; I do strive for photorealism, so it's nice when someone's fooled (even if it's only briefly).